Dear Boys: I Wouldn’t Change
I wouldn’t change the inseparable bond between a mother and a son.
I wouldn’t change my new outlook on life, as I view the world from a different lens.
I wouldn’t change having my feet grow a half size with each pregnancy, nor the leaky boobs, or the feeling that I may pee my pants when I sneeze.
I wouldn’t change the fact that I have lost hair and grown bangs, three separate times, and it is not the 80s!
I wouldn’t change getting peed on when I change a diaper or being queen butt wiper or snot scooper.
I wouldn’t change how comfortable I have become with myself and my personality because I see glimpses of myself every day when I look at the three of you.
I wouldn’t change the constant chatter and never-ending stream of questioning.
I wouldn’t change always having an audience whether it is while I’m showering or while I’m in the bathroom. (My favorite question is: “Why does pee come out of girls butts?”)
I wouldn’t change waiting in a Chick-fil-a line a mile long…just to buy a kids meal. I know one day I will want those moments in the car back.
I learned the art of getting ready in less than 3 minutes; a talent learned that my husband thinks should never change.
I wouldn’t change the fact that I have to ask multiple times each day “Where are your pants?” and “Why is everyone only in underwear?”
I would never change being your advocate, your biggest cheerleader because life is not always fair, or kind especially to boys and their energetic behavior. (We are already dealing with our fair share of curveballs.)
I wouldn’t change growing in my faith because without faith parenting challenges can make one feel extremely lonely.
I wouldn’t change the permanent dark circles on my face or the many years of sleepless nights. (I am sure they will get worse when the testosterone of teenage boy life happens).
I wouldn’t change hearing the belly laughs when someone farts or the boy idioms that surround poop or anything private part related.
I wouldn’t change adjusting my schedule and working at night just to make sure I can see you sing in the preschool play, where I sit praying to the lord, frightened for you, that you don’t fall off the stage or embarrass yourself.
I wouldn’t change the constant distraction and inability to focus on one thing completely, because I am always worried about what is happening in each of your lives.
I wouldn’t change getting the newspaper and being distracted by the worms on the driveway.
I wouldn’t change the hugs that turn into headlocks, or the slobbery kisses, or the child clinging to my leg in a big crowd. (I apologize to the bystanders who I may have flashed because my dress has been lifted up).
I wouldn’t change having my makeup brushes or mascara turned into imaginary swords or train crossing gates.
I wouldn’t change playing “ninja freeze” or “monster” around the kitchen, having dance parties while standing on the coffee table, playing “tickle monster” in our pj’s, or jumping on the mini-trampoline that now has found a permanent home in our family room.
I wouldn’t change singing “Blippy” songs, having the YouTube kids song “Mommy Finger” play in my head, or finding myself singing Raffi “Baby Beluga” in the shower instead of the music I prefer.
I wouldn’t change lying in bed next to you and thinking my life has never been better as you snuggle by my side.
I wouldn’t change looking in the rearview mirror and thinking “How are you so beautiful?”
I wouldn’t change the genuineness, sensitivity, and vulnerability that all young boys have at a young age.
I wouldn’t change any part of this stage or this picture of our life.
I wouldn’t change how God made YOU.
I am proud of you boys always. Yes, there are days I am scared and days where I am excited to see the Knight boys become men but for now, I wouldn’t change a thing! I am blessed to be your mom, but most of all: A boy mom!